Bill's makeover.. Part 3.. Eric's take on the whole thing...

It's Halloween night at Fantasia. Pam is in the office going through the "Lost & Found" bin. Some tourist  called in a panic from their hotel room. They may have left their cell phone in the bathroom. Lucky for the tourist, Ginger had taken their call. She is as sweet as pie and as cute as a kitten. However, smart was not a word you would use to describe Ginger. After taking the message, she walked across the floor, over to where Pam was stationed. Pam was looking as sexy as ever. Black leather "Cat Woman" style jumper with some bad ass black boots and a whip to match. Her hair was up in a high ponytail and her makeup was very "Sophia Loren" circa 1968. Ginger in her very whiny, high pitch southern accent ( think Jessica Simpson) taps Pam on the shoulder. "Hey, Pam, this lady called she might have left her phone here". Pam giving her the side eye, "Yeah and ?". "Well, I thought you could look in Lost & Found." Pam taking the note from Ginger's fingers, " Next time tell them to fuck off". Ginger as usual wasn't sure if Pam was being facetious ( yeah, well that wouldn't be word Ginger would use). "Well, you and Eric told me to be nice, cuz them folks * pointing to the tourists* are paying my salary.. I'm". Pam clicked her fingers, "Geesh, Ginger..never mind. Go back to the bar. Stand there and look pretty".

So now we find Pam going through the "Lost & Found" bin.

Pam: * to herself* "There is not enough Purell in the world...."

Just then Eric comes in.

Eric: 'Why would you put your hands in that box? Don't we just tell the vermin to
 fuck off when they call crying for their crap?"

Pam: *Looks up at her maker* "Yeah, well guess who took the call?"

Eric: *grinning* "Oh, Ginger... She needs to stop being so nice".

Pam: "Yeah, well good luck with that".

Eric: *sitting down on the couch* " Now, what is this I hear you're giving Compton a make-over?"

Pam: " Before you get your red undies in a twist.. I'm doing it as a favor to Baby Vamp".

Eric: "Jessica? Why?"

Pam: "Look.." * throwing the box on the floor* " She did us a HUGE favor while you were on vacation with Sookie. Jessica came in and worked that Nan Flanagan party. "

Eric: "That fucking Flanagan... I hate that bitch. * Popping his knuckles* " So your helping her with Compton? Have you ingested silver?'

Pam: *Wiping her hands with a moist towelette* " Look she's a nice kid".

Eric starting laughing

Pam: "I'm serious, Eric. She is really sweet. Plus I can't believe I'm gonna say this... I think we may be friends now".

Eric: * Now is laughing even harder* : " Pam, Pam... This is so "Lifetime Movie" of you"

Pam: * Making a face* : "Go ahead laugh. Fine. Jessica is my friend. Besides...Bill is driving her nuts. He never goes out. He doesn't even lurk around Sookie's driveway anymore".

Eric: * Looking serious*: "He better not".

Pam: " Well between playing Wii, watching Oprah and then having Franklin over..."

Eric: " Franklin? Ugh. That guy is creepy. I happen to be 850 years older than Franklin and even he creeps me out ".

Pam: " See , you get it?Anyway....Jessica needs Man Bangs out of the house and out of her hair. So she's basically trying to get him a girlfriend".

Eric: * laughing* "I would start by buying him some new clothes. Gray and Brown seem to be his favorite colors. When I think about it... his colors are as boring as he is."

Pam: "So you're okay with this?"

Eric: " Yeah, of course. I thought I'd give you a hard time. "

Pam smiles at her maker. Eric stands to rise and head back out to the bar. Then turns around and says:

Eric: "Oh, and make sure you explain to Bat Boy that he needs to stop coloring his hair  If he doesn't shave, his beard will still be gray and the top of that mop will be shoe polish black."

Pam: *Her eyes are open extra wide" " He dyes his hair? "

Eric: *grins* "Yeah, Sookie told me. She also told me he sucks his thumb after sex."

Pam: "No way."

Eric giving Pam a look that says "I'm not kidding".

Pam: "He's more pathetic than I thought."